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Showing posts from March, 2019

RED PART : 3

"How are you feeling miss Manishaa?"........... I looked up to see a young, beautiful, smiling lady in sky blue typical nurse's uniform standing beside me.                 "Umm....better",i whispered. I was lying in a bed (bed covered with blue bed sheets), my head resting on a soft pillow(that felt the softest pillow ever). The room was probably 320 square feet having spotlessly white-colored walls. On my left was a table (flower vase stayed calmly on the table), beside the table was a huge grey lounge(so huge that three like me could easily sleep). "How am I supposed to be here?....err...what happened to me?....and who brought me here?......since how long I'm here?..."I asked politely to the nurse and tried to be as calm as possible. My questions followed one after another like the semester exams not giving them time to pause(till then I was aware of being in a hospital bed)..... "Miss Manisha, Please take this medicine and rest. You can go

My Journey to heaven

universe beyond imagination The worst feeling in the world is the feeling of being unwanted and unloved. For some reason, I always felt I was not enough. I tried to hurt my body in several ways in order to compensate for the pain that I had in my heart. I also tried to harden my emotions, stiffen my voices, shorten my smile, and make myself forlorn. I slept for hours and hours; not because I was lazy but just to escape this life, escape the ugliest feelings that I had in my head. Every night when I lay on my bed, surrounded by a net, covered by a huge blanket, just peeping my nose for air, I could not still resist my insecurities. The dark walls in front of me, they frightened me every night. I listened to the most painful songs as if I was addicted to that pain. I spelled my emotions in social media where I was always judged and never really understood. I gave myself to the people who I thought were mine  and they gave me an emptiness with my anxiety intensified and my soul suffered a

तपाईं तपाईंको दिमाग हैन !

तपाईं तपाईंको दिमाग हैन | आजको अस्तब्यस्त समाजमा हामी खुशी ,सम्पन्नता, सन्तुस्टि,सुरक्षा ,माया आदिको खोजिमा दिन रात कुदिरहेका हुन्छौँ |हामी मध्ये धेरैलाई त आफु के का लागि हिड्दै छु भन्ने सोच्न सम्म नि फुर्सद हुँदैन |बाहिरी बस्तुहरुमा आफ्नु खुशी खोज्ने हाम्रो बानिले गर्दा नै आज हामी गहिरो दु:खमा छौं |बाहिरी बस्तु भन्नाले ति सबै कुराहरु जस्लाई हामी मेरो भन्ने गर्छौं;जस्तै: मेरो घर ,मेरो गाडी ,मेरो जमिन ,मेरी श्रीमती ,मेरो श्रीमान्,मेरा बच्चा ,मेरो शरीर |यी सबै केही नभएर तपाईंको दिमागले खेलेको खेल हो |समाजले या भनौ तपाईंको हुर्केको सेरोफेरोले तपाईंलाई केही नियमहरु सिकाएको जस्को पालन तपाईं दिन रात गर्दै हुनुहुन्छ बिना  कुनै प्रश्न किनभने ति नियमहरु तपाईंको दिमागमा सेट भएका छन् |तपाइले दिमागलाई चलाऊनु पर्ने थियो तर आजको बिडम्बना दिमागले तपाईंलाई चलाई रहेछ यो सबै पडिरहदा तपाईंलाई मेरा कुराहरु निक्कै दार्शनीक् लाग्लान् |येदि सबै कुराहरु हुँदा हुँदै पनि जीवन अधुरो जस्तो लाग्छ,आफुलाई सधैं दुखी मात्र पाउनु हुन्छ, बिना कारण रिश उठ्छ, मनमा धेरै कुराहरु खेलिरहन्छ भने आउनुहोस् एक्छिन समय दिएर पढ्नुह